He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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