well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
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Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
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I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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