a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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