We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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