I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
