He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
