is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
