this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
