Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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