What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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