Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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