just come out here and I will go home with you...
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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