He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
