I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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