You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
