im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize