I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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