You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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