Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
