currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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