you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
