btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize