I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
