just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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