Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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