you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
