Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
