Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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