My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
