If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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