I showed him my bush... on skype.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
