Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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