I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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