PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?