Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
The Most Iconic Met Gala Looks The Kardashian’s Have Rocked
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.