Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone