I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
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