Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
