Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Randomize