Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
