I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
