were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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