I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
