that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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