Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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