You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
