i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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