U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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