I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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