No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
