I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
We just shotgunned beers for America
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Randomize
