Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
