he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
